Trying to be a bad boy

Trying to be a bad boy...I have been told that what you like
Cigarette grasped in my fingers a lighter kindling fire of arrogance and despair
The smoke of anger rising up shrill like your voice
To shout as we argue and to cut you off as you complain about my changing style
Dogma adorned with manipulation...toxic precisely as you describe your worst nightmares
I have been told that's how the relationship survives
To raise my hands as you protest not to hit but close enough to make you believe
That I won't hesitate if you cross the line
Whiskey on the rocks...single malt...Glenfedical...Oak barrel and the terminologies I have been learning
Learning to sound like a man of taste
Long hair a leather jacket and a royal enfield whom I'll practice to appear like a man of choice
A man of words as I abuse
And a man of action as I push the passerby
A man of rage as I punch the wall throw anything not to expensive
Anything closest to me and anything that will make a noise
Will that be enough for you to call me a man of your choice
I'll show sudden politeness here and there....only enough to make you believe
Believe that only you can fix me in this timeline
I'll lose all attributes that come in my transformation of being the so-called bad boy
I'll stop writing poetry about love freedom and being one we like
Sufi songs and words of Rumi I won't even let empathy, Imagination, or curiosity shatter the new dogma I have imbibed
I'll keep a distance from tolerance ambiguity...I promise I'll support misogyny and I'll threaten you to wear what you like
I'll scrutinize your movements
Who was he? Why were you talking to him?
Send me all your passwords...Don't you date to go out tonight
I promise I'll poke you with all these questions
I'll stop going on long walks holding hands or anything affectionate that resembles who was I
Will that be enough for you to call me mine?

By: Kshitij Sinha
29/8/2024

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